The “Your Turn” study that I did involved breaching personal
space of someone else. My brother had a friend over who I knew but we aren't
what you would call friends. Going into this I was a little nervous because I
had no idea how he was going to react or whether or not it would be awkward or
not.
At dinner I
sat very close to him breaching his personal bubble. When I was doing this I
felt a kind awkward simple because it didn't feel “right”, I could tell that my
brother’s friend had noticed how close I was to him and was uncomfortable about
it as well. After a few moments when he noticed I wasn't moving he tried to
scoot away from me a little bit. You could tell he was trying not to bring any
attention to the situation and was simply trying to remove himself and make the
situation “normal” again. When he did this I tried to scoot closer to him again
when I sat back down after getting up. This time I found it to be more awkward
because he had a quicker reaction and asked me to give him some room. I did and
that was the end of it.
Looking
back at the “test” and observing what was happening I realized how programmed
we are to what is normal. When a group of people sit down at a table that is
not particularly crowded you are expected to give people a fair amount of
space. But what is considered a fair amount of space? And why when a table is
crowded do the rules change? I often have to sit at a crowded table because of
the size of my family (there are 5 of us who are all at least 6 feet tall sit
at a table that should only sit 4) do the rules change. I don’t find it to be
to unusual to sit a table where you are touching elbows with the person next to
you. It’s interesting to think about how
little things like the size of a table or the number of people sitting at it
can change the norms that we follow when sitting at it.
When
reflecting on this test I started to think about the other unspoken norms in
everyday life. I often rode the city bus home from school and there are many
norms on the bus. People are expected to be quiet and keep to themselves when
on the bus. The bus driver never has the radio on which keeps the bus even more
quiet. You don’t sit next to someone unless there are no seats available and
even then it is sometimes more gracious to simply stand. Looking back on these
norms I wonder how my outlook on riding the bus would have been if people were
expected to talk to each other and the bus driver could have music playing in
the background.
Good job. A few thoughts -
ReplyDeleteYou should be more selective in your use of the terms "study" and "test." A "study" would be far more comprehensive and the term "test" suggests an experimental model in which there is a control group and an experimental group. This was just an exercise.
While this is a very solid job, you could have developed your response to the latter part of the assignment a bit more. I.e., "Then, discuss a bit about what you see as the role of culture and norms in society. Keep in mind that the end result is intended to be a thoughtful discussion of culture, norms, and the role that norms play in society." You say a little, but don't offer a fully developed discussion of these issues.
I liked reading this. Doing these kinds of experiments gives me a new perspective on everyday norms. When I started reading your post I kind of giggled to myself as I put myself in your shoes. I don't know how my brother's friends would react to this. Did you ever tell him what you were doing after the fact? It would be interesting to know if he moved away the first time without realizing it considering how "normal" it is to move away from someone who is too close. I like your thoughts regarding the norms on busses. Maybe you should try sitting next to someone on the bus when there are only a few people on the bus :)
ReplyDeleteYou added great detail in your description of infringing on someone's personal space. I think it would be a good idea to talk about cultural norms between males versus females. Obviously your acquaintance was very uncomfortable with you sitting so close to him. How do you think cultural attitudes play a role in people of different sexes interacting with each other? I also thought that your bus example was a great one! I think that if you were born in a different culture, the expectations for social etiquette would be different. Maybe talk about that a little bit more.People who take public transportation are often concerned with their safety. You could expand on the idea of how cultural norms and how they play a role in people being concerned with their safety.
ReplyDelete